Will Divorce Mediation Work for You?
During divorce mediation, a neutral third party would help you and your spouse come to an agreement on separation issues like child custody, a division of property, and other contested issues that might hinder finalizing your divorce.
Is mediation for you? Here are some pieces of information that may help you.
It is not for everyone
While it has helped thousands of divorcing couples, divorce mediation does not work for everyone, and would be most effective if the following conditions are true:
You agree on basic issues
Both of you want to get a divorce. If one of you does not want a divorce, mediation will not work. Also, neither of you should want to reconcile.
In this scenario, it would be so much easier for both of you to focus your energies on your family’s future instead of recreating your past.
Neither of you is blaming the other for the breakdown of your marriage. In case one or both of you are intent on punishing the other, mediation is not for you.
You want to be friends. Both of you want to remain friends. This is especially true if you have children and you would like to resolve your issues the most peaceful way possible for your children’s sake, explains a divorce mediation expert in Long Island.
There is honesty
You honestly believe that your spouse has been honest with you while married. For example, if you strongly feel that your spouse lied to you about your finances or had an affair, you would most likely find it hard to believe anything your spouse says while in mediation.
No other issues involved
You are fully capable of standing up for yourself on contested divorce issues without being aggressive towards your spouse. There is no question about domestic violence, alcohol, or drug dependence. Both of you agree on almost all divorce issues.
If you both could approach the entire process with respect for each other and open minds, you would benefit from divorce mediation. Mediation could only work if both of you feel safe expressing your opinions because the most vital element of mediation is open and honest communication.